Re: [atlarge-discuss] Re: [wg-web] Re: passwords to access the preview icannatlarge.org site

[Jan Siren <sirenj@iu.net>]

Thank you for a strong effort.  In my comments below, interspersed with your 
text, I haven't attempted to go to the level of editing detail that Judyth 
did.  Instead, I have tried in a broader sense to relate what you have 
written to the reason why, in the first place, I got interested in Internet 
governance in general and ICANN in particular.


NameCritic wrote:
>  
...
 
> 
> IcannAtLarge.org is global internet community that you are urged to join for
> free, whose members are concerned about issues such as;
> 
The following paragraph in particular is the most problematical to me.  Had 
"WHOIS information" been the way I had first encountered Internet governance 
issues, I would have passed right over it and moved on to other things.  And 
"WHOIS" is still only peripherally interesting to me (not having a domain 
name).  This paragraph should be moved below the next four.
 
> Your Rights regarding the way WHOIS Information is displayed to the public
> and how your privacy is protected from governments, spammers, and others who
> would sell your information for profit or otherwise use the information in a
> harmful way.
>  
The following two paragraphs should be combined into one.  The privacy, 
security, and freedom part should lead off.
 
> Your Rights involving Domain Names and Domain Name Registrys and Registrars
> such as the introduction of new TLDs and how they are determined and
> distributed, the policies about the Transfer of Domain Names, how Domain
> Name Registration is handled, how Domain Name Disputes are decided, as well
> as Trademark and other Intellectual Property Issues surrounding the use of
> domain names.
> 
> Your Rights to Internet Privacy, Security, and Freedom. Your right to use
> the Internet in whatever country you may be in, regardless of your race or
> creed, without government censorship, control, or invasive monitoring, as
> well as without the control and restrictions multi-national corporations and
> ICANN wish to place on those rights. 
I like the following two paragraphs so much that I think they should 
directly follow your introduction.  They could also be combined into a 
single and stronger paragagraph.
 
> Your Right to have a voice and a vote involving the way policies, rules, and
> laws are being made that affect you and your ability to use of the Internet
> freely and without interference or restriction.
> 
> Your Right to have a voice involving the use of DNS, the way DNS is Governed
> and Administered, as well as many other Technical Issues surrounding the
> rights of users worldwide. 
The rest OK by me.
 
> 
> By joining and participating in icannATLARGE.org, you help us fight for
> those rights and address issues related to Policy and Rules set forth by
> Organizations such as ICANN (Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and
> Numbers), the DNSO (Domain Name Supporting Organization), The ALAC (At Large
> Advisory Committee), The IETF (Internet Engineering Task Force), and others,
> some of whom want to control the Internet for their own purposes. And you
> help us influence them to decide these rules and policies in a bottom-up
> democratic process that begins with you and other individual users, not by
> governments or multi-national corporations.
> 
> We hope you will join us and make your voice heard on these issues. Your
> vote counts! Join today!
>



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